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Showing posts with label #health. Show all posts
Showing posts with label #health. Show all posts

Sunday, 17 January 2016

A Little Fresh Air: Walking It Off.

Brentford - five miles from home 
= a few cobwebs dusted from my mind

I've been trying to take a more sensible approach to working off some of the stuffing and pastry-based products Christmas always includes for me, and just aiming for a number of steps in a day. Sensible rather than ultra juicing (kale only, of course) whilst doing a billion squats a day is the only way at the moment.


I don't have the time to run during daylight hours, and I have about as much enthusiasm for getting up in the dark and rain to run as I have to spend an entire 5 seconds listening to a 1970s open university programme on physics. I'm aiming for 10000 steps a day, which is just about doable with the number of escalator steps plus making meetings at least a floor away from where I am, so I have to clock some extra paces.

Syon House and the Thames on a cold, clear day

The year has brought some new responsibilities, which have given me much to think about, and little time in which to put thoughts into actions. As the new network chair of our mental health network at work I am really keen to follow on the amazing work the last chair and committee put in, not least since supporting mental health has become so central to my life.

Free as a bird. How I want my mind to be.

For this reason I was thrilled to take on a voluntary role leading digital and social communications for the City Mental Health Alliance, too, which is an incredible opportunity to help support colleagues in the city beyond my own organisation. These opportunities will help me to achieve my goal of reaching more organisations with the truth about what mental health really means (from my own perspective especially) and that people can thrive professionally with the right level of support from their work and the care they give to themselves.

Kew Gardens from the tow path. Nothing but views.

Critically, while any change is going on, I need to make sure that I take care of my mental health, so I don't risk exhaustion and having to give up these things, which would risk bringing out that old chestnut self-loathing, always a very unwelcome guest in my life. "Balance," I keep telling myself, "balance." I really need to find this as much as possible to keep me well, at work and out of hospital. Enough activity, enough active rest and enough physical rest and time out from doing anything at all. I need all of these things for the best chance to stay well.

Even if it means getting a bid mucky, I'm up for a challenge.
Mentally and physically, I think.

It's definitely easier said than done. I'm the first to admit that I'm not very good at saying 'no' to exciting opportunities, even if they might take a lot of work. I don't want the fact that I have depression to get in the way of taking on ambitious projects in my life.

Choosing pathways. Nearly six miles in.

I admit that in the past I've tried to manage an ever increasing workload by ploughing on through it at all hours of the day (particularly in the past, trying to get promoted and actively panicking that if I made a single 'mistake' that I would miss out). Now I know that working 100 hour weeks is not even realistic for one week, let alone a string of them. So even though my stomach currently has butterflies at the amount of work I have on for the weeks ahead, I have forced myself not to spend the weekend working or completing ever more activities. The weekends are there for a reason, and I will just get ill and stressed if I don't have a break.

Kew Bridge and rowing.
I think I chose a slightly more sedentary activity, but lovely to see!

Yesterday, then, I decided to spend time on things that would help me to take time out and hopefully get a different perspective. And what often helps me is to get out and about, into the fresh (and ideally not rainy) air and walk.

And it's quite hard to get lost!

I learned about London on foot. I first moved to Archway, single and with a lot of friends well established with their weekends filled, so, with no other plans, I used to walk all the way down Holloway Road on a Sunday morning and keep going, into the deserted city, its austere stone blocks feeling almost as cold as Oxford on any autumnal morning as no pedestrians and few cars blunted the sharp wind racing around its tall, noble cornices. Nowadays I really am spoiled for choice, living near to two of our most beautiful royal parks - Richmond and Bushy - and a five minute walk from the Thames.

Perfect running weather. Or walking. Or rowing. 
Perfect.

My mother taught me to be a walker in Nottingham, where I grew up. To my horror, on days when at least half of my classmates had to stay away from school due to snow, because we lived in the centre of town, there was no discussion: we would walk. I find it faintly comical now, because the walk was fewer than two miles in length, but to my five or six year old self it was a marathon distance, on top of the massive unfairness of having to go to school when I wanted to stay at home and make snowmen.

Under the district line across to Chiswick. 

I have many happy memories of walking now, though, and it has always kept me - relatively - fit. Mat and I have a shared love of walking around London, which his friends exploited when he was made to walk (for pleasure) from Hammersmith to central London for his stag do, and made to (for their pleasure) down a shot chaser with every pint consumed, at every pub, along the way. Ouch.

A booze-free walk for me. Phew!

I had to walk to the doctor two weeks ago as I appear to have developed sleep apnoea... always a delight to have a new condition to add to my collection... and wanted the exercise. It has been so wet and miserable here in January so far that I have shunned running and even a walk to the station has been a chore.

Made it to Chiswick Bridge... nearly there!

But walking makes me feel so much better. Or at least prevents me from feeling any worse, if I'm feeling unwell. I have always found a lovely rhythm to walking. I can listen to the birds or the river or the traffic; I can listen to podcasts (Woman's Hour is a firm favourite) or audio books, or I can listen to the Frozen soundtrack or the Trout quintet, with no one any the wiser what music I might have in my ears!

Under the bridge

As I walk, I don't care so much about whatever I've left behind. Part of me is concentrating on not falling over, so there can only be so much focus on the extended to-do list; part of me is listening to the soundtrack of my choice. And lastly, my eyes are part devouring, part dwelling on, the sights to every side.

Mud. Nothing doing. Mud.

I'm lucky to live in a place where I can walk so far along the river to many destinations, to the shops two or three miles away, depending on the direction, or farther afield, and all bypassing beautiful houses, boats, locks, gull, herons, cormorants and many river birds, proprietary robins, bridges, gardens and streams and rivers. And of course, the city buildings and omnipresent sky.

A mere spattering. I got off lightly!

The mud is another matter, and not particularly top of my list of things I want to adorn myself with as a fashionable accessory. Elizabeth Bennet may have got away with it, but she was, after all, the wittiest of women, and the beauty of Hertfordshire, as even Mr. Darcy realised in the end.

 "She has nothing, in short, to recommend her, but being an excellent walker. I shall never forget her appearance this morning. She really looked almost wild."
   "She did indeed, Louisa. I could hardly keep my countenance. Very nonsensical to come at all! Why must she be scampering about the country, because her sister had a cold? Her hair, so untidy, so blowsy!"
   "Yes, and her petticoat; I hope you saw her petticoat, six inches deep in mud, I am absolutely certain; and the gown which had been let down to hide it, not doing its office."
   "Your picture may be very exact, Louisa," said Bingley; "but this was all lost upon me. I thought Miss Elizabeth Bennet looked remarkably well when she came into the room this morning. Her dirty petticoat quite escaped my notice."

There are other benefits. The assault of nature experienced while walking is another way of practising mindfulness. Except of course that you're not really practising, it's got you with both hands. There is no way that I can just ignore sights like those above when I'm walking. In fact I think I made myself a bit late yesterday by stopping so many times to take photographs.

Even the river bank is fascinating.
I've seen mice, rats (I like rats by the river)
and many other lovely animals and plants.

As well as all the above, it is lovely to meet so many people along the way on the river - quite different to my earlier north London experiences early on a Sunday morning. Cyclists, runners, yes, but walkers of all ages and many nationalities with dogs, dressed for a smart Saturday lunch, dressed for another 30 miles in well-trodden walking boots, it is simply lovely to spend an hour (or three) on a bracing walk. It warms you up in the cold, and warms me through to participate in this community activity, albeit on my own, with a simple smile of "Hello" to those I pass.

Dry routes are good. As long as you're still dry.

Yesterday I met friends in Barnes (west London) for a pub lunch. And there really only is one thing I love better than a pub lunch with good friends, and that is a pub lunch with good friends that I feel that I've thoroughly earned at the end! I had my work cut out to make it there on time with a slightly more relaxed stroll with Mat to Richmond (three miles) before the remaining five and a half to cover at a considerably speedier pace!

End in sight!

This week will be very busy again, and I know that my to do list is only minutely shorter for the few things I've accomplished today. (Then again, I did make it to the tip today. Things really don't get much more exciting than that.) However busy it will be, though, I have breathed fresh air and had a decent attempt at exercise. And there are always West Wing conversations to be had. That's my tip of the week, dear professional readers. If you want to get a meeting with someone who doesn't have time for a meeting, go and meet them as their meeting ends and walk them to their next meeting. Polish your elevator pitch or the points you need to raise to a minute's chat and you might be surprised what you accomplish in a short walk around the building (as well as adding a few more steps to your day)!

Yeah. Not sure...

I slept better, and woke surprisingly rested (albeit with rather aching legs this afternoon). As always, I will see how the week goes. But tomorrow when I get on those escalators at Waterloo, I'll know that a few steps are - in more ways than one - in the right direction. Take care. x

Hooray! A lemonade for the muddy woman with the purple hair.

Saturday, 12 December 2015

Everything's Going to be Alright... Feel-Good Ideas for Finding Happiness Against the Odds


The funeral I attended yesterday was terribly sad, but also managed to be a wonderful celebration of Lucy's life, which I am lucky to have attended, and so very lucky to have known her.

Aside from the odd set back which I still have to - very actively - work through, I am working hard to take care of my mental health and recover, challenging negative thoughts, mind reading, worrying, ruminating, making assumptions with no evidence, and lots more. I've been recovering for a year and a half now, and taking responsibility for my wellness (while asking for support from others) is really important. Luckily I am a lot better - I am one of the lucky ones - and while I'll still be managing it for a long time, I'm at least having a good patch at the moment with the new medication, the therapy continuing and more...

What was clear yesterday from the discussions at the funeral was how important and enriching the people and activities that we fill our lives with. Even though Lucy is no longer with us, we heard stories of her infinite kindness, zest for singing, language learning, walking and doing it all supporting herself and others while pursuing ambitious academic endeavours.

It started me thinking about the things that help me to feel a bit better - whether I'm well and want to keep my health good, am struggling and need a boost, or am down right ill and need something to make me feel a bit better. Small things can help. Here are mine...

Music really makes me come alive. When I'm sad it can help me sit with my sadness, and uplifting tunes can make me smile when nothing else does. I can't understand a life without music!

The perfect feel good tracks. Not all my desert island discs,
but lovely tunes that uplift me through the dark moments.
Click here for the playlist on YouTube
Feel-Good Songs:
1)      Let the River Run
2)      Firework - Katy Perry
3)      Titanium - David Guetta featuring Sia
4)      Flashlight - Pitch Perfect Various Artists
5)      That Lady - Isley Brothers
6)      Ugly - Sugababes
7)      Here Comes the Sun - The Beatles
8)      Hoppipolla - Sigur Ros
9)      One day like this - Elbow
10)   Starting Today - Natalie Imbruglia
11)   In Demand - Texas
12)   Belfast - Orbital
13)   You Get What You Give - The Free Radicals
14)   Rhythm of the Night - Corona
15)   Shine - Tracy Bonham

(I should also add that a health rendition of Let It Go works WONDERS for my spirits!)

You even get subtitles! WIN!

As I've said before, enjoying good food and drink is both good for my health - the juices I drink to combat my anxiety feelings, the fish I eat a lot of to boost my bone density and eat some good fats, without empty carbs... and then there are the delicious empty cards, the sugar, the deliciously fatty burgers and friends and the warming, aromatic yummy dumplings. And as for Marks and Spencers' 'nom snacks'...bacon and cheese snacks. I salute you.

Feel Good Foods
The foods that are 'good' for me, and the foods that are gooood for me. 
So, I'm well fed. Yep. so I'm a happy camper with a mixture of the delicious and nutritious. There may be slightly more of the goood stuff around Christmas. I can neither confirm nor deny that there are about twenty packets of Marks and Spencers' bacon-wrapped-cheese morsels of delissiousness. That's a fair way to being contended. 

So next up is the clothing that makes me feel warm and fuzzy, which you'll be unsurprised to see from the photo montage contain a fair few warm and fuzzy items of clothing.

Snug, snug, snug, snug, snug.
Here are some of the places where you can get your hands on these snugly items:
From top left:
1. T-Shirt - VioletFlamingo
2. Maroon cords - Gap
3. Ear muffs - asoya.com
4. Gloves - Dents
5. Penguin jim jams - cyberjammies.co.uk
6. Christmas onesies - ebay.com
7. Hats - wheretoget.it
8. SNUG socks - surfdome.co.uk
9. Scarf - AndOtherStories
10. Coat - wardrobeoxygen.com

Imagine wearing all of these, because Mat won't let me have the heating on, and you'll have a pretty accurate picture of what I'm wearing most of the time...at home. I wear some at work, but even I feel that 'bring your whole self to work' might not stretch to a reindeer onesie. But you never know!

Right, I'm dressed in every snug thing, I've got positive tunes on, and I've eaten about 67 bacon and cheese snacks. What's next? 

Beauty. Okay, at this point I realise I may lose a few male readers. But bear with me because a few of these tips are good for everyone I think. The reason I decided to write about this is because my body physically manifests my mental health problems, and I think that's something that not everyone understands.For example, I have a psoriasis flare up on my scalp at the moment. Psoriasis is genetic and only occurs from time to time in my case, but it's not very nice, so I've been trying to treat it with specific medication. In addition to the juicing (which helps) and the medication for it, I then want to try to make the rest of my body feel better and try to keep my skin looking as okay as possible. 

It's not exactly rocket science to understand that when you feel crap on the inside, looking good on the outside can help massively helpful - or on the flipside, not looking great is miserable. 

Beauty products to protect, perfect, comfort, soothe...
Here are my favourite beauty products for feeling good (and preventing minor injuries!)
From top left:
1. Primer (Laura Mercier) - on top of a richer moisturiser for the winter, this helps keep my makeup from escaping in the winter chills.
2. Touche Éclat (Yves Saint Laurent) - to provide for all our highlighting needs in the winter when we've had not enough sleep and too much work. This has made me look a lot more human a fair few times.
3. Facial Fuel (Kiehl's). This one's designed for men, but it's a light, soothing and slightly astringent moisturiser that is great for after a shave, but I love it summer and winter under day makeup. It's great.
4. Vaseline (Vaseline) - good for cracked lips, for dry skin, for dry hands, for moisturising really dry skin (even on my face) I really appreciate this. (Plus, as a runner, vaseline is my saviour when I'm trying to avoid chafing!)
5. Poême (Lancôme) - my favourite perfume. The perfume that, when I wear it, people actually say I smell nice...so clearly I'm going to wear it forever. Please don't stop making in Lancôme!
6. Facial Cleanser (Kiehl's) - takes all my makeup off. Is smooth. Is creamy but light. Love this product.
7. Compeed - if you're going to a party or in new shoes, or like me want to do a long distant run, investing in some high quality blister protection helps massively.
8. Party Feet (Dr. Scholl) - not just for Christmas. These inserts for the soles of your shoes and heels protect rubbing, blisters, and enable me to actually wear heels for more than 10 minutes.
9. Nail varnish (Chanel) - I'm a recent Chanel convert but I do believe these colours are beautiful. Obviously you have to stink out the room / train carriage / office when you put it on, but nice nails are a nice touch. (I just need to work on the 'not-needing-the-loo-as-soon-as-I-put-it-on' problem.)
10. Finally...drum roll...Beauty Flash Balm (Clarins) - this is a miracle product. It peps up your skin, keeps your makeup on and even if you wake up with a hangover the next day, your skin will look fresh as a daisy.

So now I'm primped and pampered, warm in my pyjamas, well fed and relaxing because of the music... just a couple of other things that can help.

Uplifting Reads to Relax to and Rest with

Some of the books that I love, that have helped me feel better and that have helped me to 'feel' something when depression numbs my senses.

Feel Good Fiction and Fact
1. The Rosie Project - Graeme Simsion
2. Possession - A.S. Byatt
3. Behind the Scenes at the Museum - Kate Atkinson
4. Four Letters of Love - Niall Williams
5. Oliver Twist - Charles Dickens (and others)
6. The Miracle Life of Edgar Mint - David Udall
7. The White Tiger - Aravind Adiga
8. The Velveteen Rabbit - Margery Williams
9. Stones into Schools - Greg Mortenson
10. Watermelon, The Brightest Star in the Sky, Rachel's Holiday, Sushi for Beginners...basically novels by Marian Keyes
11. Pride and Prejudice - Jane Austen
12. The Lovely Bones - Alice Sebold

And finally here are some things that are important about all else but don't fit into a neat category!



Other Feel Good Factors
1. Holding hands. I want to hold hands with my husband for as long as I can. And I want to hug my friends. I've learned how powerful hugs and hand holding are. They remind me that someone is there, looking out for me, and that I'm looking out for them - that we're in this life together.
2. Love. "Love is the answer." Saying "I love you" to the people I love matters, and hearing it from them matters too. I'm learning about balanced relationships - learning that for every question I'm asked, I get to ask one back, and for every loving gesture I make, I might get one in return, if I'm lucky.
3. Sofa time. Those DFS no interest adverts annoy me intensely, but the importance of comfort at home is key. I can snuggle up on the sofa, in my onesie, with my face moisturised, my woolly socks on, my dumplings and plum sauce, my uplifting music playing and a good book. Ahh
4. Sleep - can't miss this out. See last week's post.
5. ParkRun and running. Keeps my health up. Gets me out. Helps me to eat burgers.
6. Writing. A way I can express how I'm feeling and feel better through being creative with words.
7. Winter walks - hopefully with snow, but cold clear days where the weather is so beautiful is a wonderful way to spend the day.
8. Small animals - back to hugs and fun and life. Jelly cat animals are special friends.

And last but not least...love and commitment to ending the stigma around mental health.


Have a great weekend. Take care. x

Monday, 21 September 2015

Short Post - Shortlisted for Women of the Future Award 2015

It is such an honour to be shortlisted for a Women of the Future award - thank you

I'm surprised, delighted and somewhat speechless and overwhelmed to announce that I've been shortlisted for a Women of the Future award in the category for Community Spirits. Congratulations to all the other women who are shortlisted with me and for the amazing work that they do.



This comes a few days after it was announced that I am also now named as 1/30 Inspirational City Women Champions of Diversity by Brummell magazine.


Being recognised by both of these organisations / publications is a tremendous honour. A year ago I still wasn't being fully open about my mental health because I was terribly afraid of the stigma I might receive from others, as I had experienced in the past. I still see that stigma and experience it both personally and through the accounts others share with me. But now I talk about it. I won't accept it. I speak out and up and will keep speaking until this stops.

I support @mindcharity and @timetochange 
as a media volunteer, a campaigner, a runner and more.
Please read more about the work of these two amazing charities here: 

This stigma has to end. Mental illness is a killer and not being able to talk about it makes it worse. If you can start a conversation in your work place, your family, with your friends or with someone on the bus where we talk about being more accepting, understanding and kind to each other, whatever our differences are, whatever illness or disability we may have, we can make this conversation part of a bigger national and international discussion where we can highlight the dreadful stigma around mental illness and  - together - end it once and for all. I represent a person who is living with a mental illness but I am living with it. I am not a psycho, a nutter, a mental case, a head case. I am not a #headclutcher. I have an illness and I need respect for that. And then I need respect to get on with my life as I choose to. And one of the things I choose is to speak up for others suffering with mental illness (and stigma) who do not feel they want to or are able to speak for themselves.

Read more here about @Rethink_ and this statistic

I hope you will join me and have a conversation about this today, tomorrow, or someday soon. #MentalHealthMatters. We all have it, and we need to look after it. Our own and others'.



Thank you for supporting my blog where I will continue to share my story and perspectives on what mental illness is really like. And thank you to @womenoffuture and @BrummellMag for recognising me. I am overwhelmed, delighted and inspired. I hope it will help to bring more people into the conversations we need to have about #MentalIllness and the actions we need to take to change how we care for mentally ill people - the millions within our country struggling and surviving (or not surviving) - better.



Thank you.